Big Brother 14 – Ep 24

We’re 24 episodes in!?  And the Finale is like two weeks away????  Where did the summer go?  Seriously, where did it go?  For me, it kind of was a blur, especially once Larry left for NY.  But you didn’t come here to this post for my ruminations on life – we’re here to talk about BB14, bitches!  I admit that CBS’ little promo before last night’s show had me intrigued:  “Will Ian be the new Super Villain?”  – uh, what?  What would that even mean?  Is he going to turn on Dan?  (not turn Dan on, but turn on him – get your mind out of the gutters!).  After the episode aired though, it was clear they knew that pretty much NOTHING OF NOTE happened at all.  Thanks, Joe, for that clarification.  Am I wrong though?

Head of Household: Ian
Nominated for Eviction: Frank & Jenn
Power of Veto Winner:  Dan
Veto Used?  Yes, on Jenn
Replacement Nominee:  Joe

Episode 24 – September 5, 2012

As you can see from the quick hits above and if you’ve been following the drama lately, those occurrences are the opposite of exciting.  So why not build up the potential that Ian was going to flip the script?  It certainly has happened in this game so much already.  Just ask Britney.  Yet nothing exciting happened.  BUT, can we all agree that many people lost their shirts in order for us to see this episode?  And contrasted to how Dan was all pasty and Ian was all geeky in the outset of the season….well, hey now.

Here’s something to consider when you think about my hypothesis.  The picture is only ruined because Frank is keeping his shirt on.  Look at Frank’s GUNS.  GEEZUS.  Dan is doing perfectly fine too, but Frank and Shane’s bodies are on a different level.  What’s funny is when Frank has to hide that mane of his, he looks completely different.  There was a pic of him and Ashley in the pool where they had both wet their hair and plopped it on top.  He was unrecognizable.  His face is much more mature and well…old.  That CarrotTop hair and doofy-looking hat let him look tons younger.  Dan was bringing it though in the way that slim guys can – so was Ian.  He’s been getting some sun and as we saw a few weeks ago, the girls are helping him with unfortunate body hair.  He’s probably even working out a bit.  Don’t worry though – Shane is still the lustiest out there, but when he’s not even a factor in the episode, he doesn’t get too much screen time.

Alright….let’s talk game.  After Ian’s nominations, Jenn is trying not to be paranoid even while everyone reassures her that Frank is Ian’s target.  Jenn and Frank strategize and unbeknownst to him, he throws himself under the bus for Dan, who is definitely NOT interested in holding up his end of the deal.  Frank, you were right to not trust Dan.  Is it too late for you at this point?  Anyway, Frank and Jenn think it out and rationalize that if Dan wins the Veto, he should use it on her as it would get one of them off the block and it wouldn’t look odd, as Dan owes Jenn for saving him last week.  Plus they know that pretty much Joe will end up the replacement nominee and he’d be easy to swing votes to.  And you know what, despite subsequent editing, THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT HAPPENED.

At the Veto, or rather OTEV competition, it was the comp where the houseguests listened to a trivia question and find an item (in this case, an ear of corn) with the right answer on it, while also making sure you’re not the last person to do so.  Just like musical chairs, there’s room for everyone but one.  It wasn’t that dramatic of a competition – in other seasons this has been a game changer – as eventually it came down to Frank and Dan.  If Dan hadn’t done a brilliant job of making everyone believe he’s in an alliance with them, Frank could have been racing for his life.  But Frank has absolutely no clue that Dan is plotting against him.  Dan ends up winning the Veto and everyone is thrilled with the result.

With Dan owning the Power of Veto, he makes even more deals.  At this point, Dan has three deals going on:

–  One deal with Frank, Jenn and Danielle which led to Dan’s resurrection and Britney’s destruction
–  A Final 2 Deal with Frank as a subset of the above deal
–  A Resurrection of the Quack Pack (Shane, Ian, Dan, Danielle) alliance, sans Britney

Now he goes up to Ian and proposes a Final 2 alliance with him, which Ian seemingly agrees to.  Interesting.  Dan tells us that in his first season, he was honestly true to his Final 2 alliance then (with the hottie Memphis), but this time, well, he’s gotta do what’s good for his family.  So he has alliances with basically everyone but Joe.  And that’s who gets screwed in this week’s events.  Ian has no problem with having to put Joe up and doesn’t care that Frank might make it as he feels that with Frank not in HoH contention “next week” (little does he know that the Double Elimination is looming again) he’s not a threat.  Ian thinks it would be in his best interest to do some acting to make sure no one thinks Ian is in on Dan’s plan.

Oh, Ian.  Your acting skills leave a lot to be desired.  When in doubt, keep it simple.  There was no need for any of that harrumphing – just nominate Joe and be done with it.  Do I think it matters all that much at this point?  Not really.  But it puts you in a more risky situation if anyone’s BS meter goes off.  Honestly, at this point in the game….Dan is likely to survive the double elimination, but if there is any doubt or hint that he’s playing the field, he could get swept out the door so fast he doesn’t have a chance to save himself.  I just don’t know if he will be that careless.  All these people deserve to lose to Dan with what he’s managed to scheme into reality.  Poor Joe here is likely heading home – what with him being the most useless player this year (he stole the crown from Jenn) and Frank probably having more friends to keep him around.  But who knows.  Frankly, I’m ready for the game to wrap up.  I love Big Brother but at this point, with Britney out and Dan clearly out-classing the rest of these guys, it seems a foregone conclusion, right?  Bring on my new seasons of Survivor and Amazing Race!

HG	Comments
	Dan – The master of the game at this point.  It is yours to lose.  I worry that the Double Elimination tonight could prove your undoing….but who am I kidding?  These people are blind and don’t see you coming.
	Danielle – You and Shane are safe per the deal with Ian (totally thought Ian would be a supervillain by stabbing you or Shane in the back – wrong!), so you’re basically boring me this week.
	Frank – It’s tragic that you have fallen for Dan’s deception.  My prediction above is that Joe is going home, but if Dan is determined to get you out…well, it was a good LONG run for you.
	Ian – I can’t be certain Dan is loyal to your Final 2 – but it sounds like he would rather honor at least one of his alliances and he must know that Danielle will default to Shane when it comes to the Final 4 situation.  So that puts you in a great spot to be his +1.
	Jenn – Dan has cleared his debt with you.  Now you are just another obstacle on the way to the Final 2.  At least you got a moment in the sun, right?
	Joe – Ugh.  Just go.
	Shane – Why isn’t your hot, sweaty torso more prominently displayed on my TV screen?  You made that deal so since you don’t have any wheeling or dealing to do…there’s no lingering shots of your body.  This. is. unacceptable.
	Britney – Evicted 7th, 9th out of the House.  2nd Jury member.
	Ashley – Evicted 6th, 8th out of the House.  1st Jury member.
	Mike Boogie – Evicted 5th, 7th out of the House.
	Wil – Evicted 4th, 6th out of the House.
	Janelle – Evicted 3rd, 5th out of the House.
	JoJo – Evicted 2nd, 4th out of the House.
	Willie – Eliminated. Effectively 3rd out of the House.
	Kara – 1st Houseguest Evicted, 2nd out of the House
	Jodi – Not really Evicted – but 1st out of the House