Amazing Race 16 Secret Scenes, Episode 11:  Dreams, Drama, and Delusion

With the final leg looming, the remaining teams are putting on their game face and reminiscing in the calm before the storm.  But Jordan’s dream has nothing on the drama at Elimination Station as Joe finally gets his wish with Louie & Michael’s elimination.  Or does he?  Does the delusion continue on?  Unfortunately, the answer is yes.  Read on for all the details there at End City as well as to find out who actually had a car crash on their way to the Pit Stop!

At the Pit Stop

Caite Holds Her Tongue:  Phil asks what Caite would like to say to any of her critics out there in the world.  Caite does have something to say but she’s going to wait to say it until the end.  It’s an important thought but she wants to save it.  She will answer Phil’s question about their thoughts of being along a bustling river in Shanghai with the World’s Tallest Man.  Both Caite & Brent are in awe of the tall celebrity as well as the experience of being where they are.

Phil asks Caite who will be the happiest to see how good they have performed.  Caite is sure that their families are happy with how they’ve done.  She then launches into how as a role model to girls and to guys even, her persistence over the last three years to prove that she’s not just a YouTube punchline is something that people can look up to.  She’s very proud of what she’s managed to accomplish and can’t contain her happiness.  Brent is sure his very large circle of friends (everything’s large with Brent, remember?) are proud of him for how well he’s done.

Detective’s Farewell:  Phil observes that the Amazing Race is pretty far from being a detective.  Michael agrees as every day on the race you would never know where you were going but it was awesome nonetheless.  Louie says that when you weren’t allowed to help out your partner was the worst aspect, as that is what being a detective is all about.  Phil points out that Louie always had Michael’s back though and they both gave it everything they had.  Louie agrees and says that he nearly puked at times doing so.

Phil bets that Louie must have lost some weight during the race.  Louie confirms this as he is now down to 213 from an initial weight of around 225-230 pounds.  Wow!  Michael also lost 18 pounds.  Phil is impressed!  So am I as I always thought Survivor was the show for losing weight.

As for what they’re going to take away from the race, Louie can’t wait to share this experience with his family once it airs on television.  It’s going to be a great story and much better than one he could have come up with on his own.  Michael will take away how big the world is and that it’s filled with many different kinds of people.  As for future adventures, they’re looking forward to enjoying some of the trips they won from their three first-place finishes.  Michael admits that while they’re proud of their first-place record, they may have peaked a little too early on.  Louie wants to come back to Germany and Italy with his wife, Michael wants to take his wife to Paris, and both are excited about seeing a rodeo in the near future!

Stronger Than Ever:  Phil tells Jet & Cord that they’re not doing bad for a couple of cowboys, but Cord corrects him and says it’s not bad for a couple of “Okies.”  Phil hadn’t heard that before and Cord is sad about how much Phil is missing out on.  With their hats still on and in good shape, Jet & Cord tell Phil that they’re ready for the last leg and all their survival in the previous legs was to get to this point.  Phil is happy to see them still in it but wonders if they have the energy to finish.  Jet tells him they have more than when they started.  Both Jet & Cord admit that Shanghai is a long way from a rodeo though and this leg was quite an education.

Tears on the Mat:  We catch Jordan in the midst of happy tears as he tells Phil how much Dan has been there for him his entire life.  These last two legs have been sheer hell as with both the taxi drivers and the massive language barrier, it’s been supremely frustrating.  But they made it through anyway.  Dan tells Phil, again, how he was only doing this to help Jordan realize his dream.  Getting on the Amazing Race was enough, but being able to actually finish the race, in either 1st, 2nd, or 3rd place, is the absolute pinnacle of the dream.

No one means more to Dan than his little brother Jordan.  When he received Jordan’s email to come on the race, he didn’t hesitate, even if the race wasn’t his thing.  Dan admits the race has been enriching for him as he’s seen things and places he never dreamed he would.  The best part was doing it for Jordan though.  Phil congratulates them both and sends them on their way.  The last leg awaits!

Extra Race Footage

A Whole New World:  Caite can’t believe how many people are in China.  She thought New York was bad, but she was wrong.  Brent is amazed at how many mopeds and bicycles there are, and the roads are pure chaos.  He tells us that their first cab driver didn’t know the area or how to read the map that Brent had, which Caite mentions is “in his language.”  Brent is still stumped as to how the driver didn’t know where they were trying to go.  Caite figures it was that he just didn’t want to take them.  Overall, Brent is happy to just still be in the race but would love it if they won the hardest leg of the race.

Louie is Bummed:  Michael tries to cheer Louie up as he’s noticing that Louie looks beat up.  Michael reminds him they have already made up two hours.  We can see that Dan & Jordan are there with them as Dan kicks some trash their direction.  It looks like they’re waiting for the bus.  Dan promises that he’s going to do to them what Louie did to Jordan in the noodle challenge, which is rock the *#@! out of them.  Louie gives him a brief once over as if he’s considering dropping Dan on the ground at this very moment.  Louie & Michael give Dan props for doing very well on the stadium puzzle.  Dan admits he’s awesome when he puts his mind to it.

Privately, Louie tells us that Michael has been trying to cheer him up.  He thinks that they would be making clearer decisions if they were by themselves.  Michael takes a positive tact and admits that after missing the fashion house entrance, which was right in front of them, that having more eyes can’t hurt.  Louie & Michael both know who their exact competition is now and it’s time to just knock out the challenges and get it done.

Louie & Michael Look Back:  In their cab ride to the Pit Stop, Louie & Michael look resigned to finishing last.  They both tell us how this amazing, once-in-a-lifetime experience is so great.  Michael knows there won’t be a real way to convey how incredible the experience was if you didn’t do it yourself.  If this does happen to be the end, there are no regrets and they’ll live with the choices they made.  Louie wants us to know that watching it at home you can tell yourself you’d never do what so-and-so did, but Louie explains you’re bound to make the exact same mistakes you are criticizing.

Michael is thrilled to have met so many great people and knows that some will be life-long friendships.  If he gets beat by the other three teams, that’s not so bad.  Louie is proud of how far they got considering that they were the oldest team left on the race.  It was a great time and there are lots of memories, although Michael will always remember bungee-jumping with a cowboy in Germany!

Cord Talks Culture:  While waiting for Jet to count up golden statues, Cord tells us that whenever you go different places you’ll encounter different religions.  China is very unusual especially from where he comes from, and he admits he doesn’t know much about Buddhists at all.  He does know that they have plenty of golden statues, which Jet is counting right now.  Through their travels during the race, they’ve seen different cultures at every spot but throughout it all, there’s been plenty of very nice people too.  That makes him happy.

After the Race

Dan & Jordan State Their Case:  Dan & Jordan say they deserve to win and illustrate their point with the fact that Jet & Cord have come in last place and were bailed out while Dan & Jordan have never come in last place.  That is true but you sure have lived in that second-to-last place a whole lot and only got first place due to a Fast Forward!  Both Dan & Jordan think they deserve to win more than the cowboys because of that fact.  Dan tells us that if the cowboys hadn’t got lucky with that non-elimination leg, they wouldn’t be here.  They’ve received no bailouts in a leg and Jordan admits that their first-place leg was due to a Fast Forward, but their gameplan coming in has brought them to the final three.

Jordan explains that once they couldn’t find the Garden Bridge in Shanghai, he went to Dan and proposed working with Louie & Michael.  This plan came from their strategy of never being alone and last.  If you’re last, always have another team with you.  Jordan likes this plan as he knew they could take on any of the other teams head-to-head.  Dan is excited about the final three as there are no slouches.  You can’t fly under the radar and get to the final three.  Dan tells us how impossibly tough it is to actually make it to the end as it’s nowhere near as easy as it may seem on television.  There are so many critical errors that can mess you up.  It’s anyone’s game at this point though.

Cowboy Crash:  Jet & Cord explain that at both the golden statue challenge and the Pork Chops challenge, Brent & Caite finished right along with them.  A taxi race ensued to the Pit Stop, but their cab driver ended sooner than they could have imagined as right as the cab tried to do a U-Turn out, he crashed his cab into a passing car.   Cord remembers it was a nice car that crashed into them.  The cab driver left as a bunch of people came over to see if everyone was okay.  Jet wasn’t sure the driver was coming back so they ended up just bailing and finding another cab.  Why wasn’t that on the broadcast?

Ready For More:  Michael tells us that originally he hadn’t wanted to leave the country anymore before the race, but once he & Louie started visiting all these places, he realized he did want to leave the country again.  He wants to take his wife to Paris and explore the beauty of the world.  They met a lot of nice, selfless people along the way and it’s opened his eyes to the world outside of America.  Louie explains that everyone knows the standard thought of how rude the French people are, but he didn’t meet one single French citizen the entire time.  While Michael was initially only focused on winning the million dollars, eventually he came to realize that the prize was the journey itself.  He’d still love a million bucks, but the experience he got is what he’s taking with him.  Being away from his family has also made him appreciate that much more than he would have previously.

Not Unbeatable:  Caite tells us that the cowboys are beatable and that they’ve had many chances before to beat them but they just couldn’t.  Something little always happened to derail their plans.  She promises to try as hard as possible to beat them in the last leg, but if the cowboys prevail she is fine with losing to them.  Brent looks at her like she’s crazy as he has no intentions of losing.  He didn’t put himself through all of this to just go home as second place, or as Brent puts it, first loser.

Brent compares the race to playing basketball with your friends.  You still want to beat them but it doesn’t mean you’re not going to be friends afterward.  With that, why would anyone want to be the loser?  Brent wishes them the best of luck (it sounds like they don’t consider Dan & Jordan a threat at all) and pledges that there will be no help at all given.  He is sure the cowboys will be doing the same thing and are there to win the race. Basically, it’s on.

Elimination Station

No more Puerto Vallarta!  We’re in End City which is San Francisco, California.  The group’s flight touches down and everyone heads to the baggage claim.  Everyone is excited to be there although Jeff really just wants to see “the bridge” and then he’s out.  After they get their luggage, they take a van ride to their hotel.  During the ride there, we get Adrian’s thoughts on how excited he is for all of this to be all almost over.  Joe points out the sights as they drive in to the city, pointing out the Bay Bridge, which throws Jeff for a loop.

At the hotel, Adrian explains the down side of being in End City, which is that they’re stuck in their rooms while in such a beautiful city.  Jordan also wishes she could go sightseeing, but Jeff is just happy to have some space from the others, especially Joe.  Jeff  has never met someone who has never been wrong about anything in their life.  Jordan would prefer that Jeff bite his tongue and move on.

In Joe & Heidi’s room, Joe explains that he & Jeff have had many disagreements, most of which started as Jeff didn’t agree with Joe’s assessment of why Louie & Michael U-Turned them.  Please please please get over this, Joe!  We see a flashback to Jeff explaining to Joe that it was a personal move as there was no reason otherwise to do so.  Monique & Shawne are excited about who actually wins the race and both are hoping it’s a close finish.

The entire gang collects in Jeff & Jordan’s room to receive their call from the eighth team to be eliminated.  Dana reminds us that Joe has made it no secret he does not want Louie & Michael to win.  I dread the reaction Joe will have when he hears their voice on the phone.  You know it will be petty.  Joe confirms to the group that he hopes Louie & Michael are eliminated.  Heidi tells us it’s all about karma and that they hope the detectives don’t make it into the final three.

The phone rings finally and Monique answers cheerfully, “Elimination Station!”  Louie’s voice fills the phone and while everyone else shouts out in surprise, Joe looks ready to pounce.  Dana knew Joe would be happy and the first thing Joe says to Louie on the phone is that since he & Heidi don’t win the million, they don’t win the million.  Michael has no idea how bitter Joe is about it and jokes that Joe would have done amazing in Shanghai.  Undeterred, Joe goes in for the kill and asks if they think it was worth it to have used the U-Turn on him.  Louie & Michael explain how huge a threat Joe would have been here in China so they have no remorse about U-Turning him.

Joe brings up Jeff’s assertion that it was personal and Jeff immediately tells him not to bring him into it.  Privately, Jeff wishes Joe would man up and just deal with getting U-Turned.  Back in the room, Joe presses Louie & Michael on if it was a personal move.  Michael reminds Joe of the trash-talking he did in the bus to France when Joe declared none of the other teams were threats to him.  Michael couldn’t believe he said that and at that point it became a gauntlet throwdown.  Privately, Adrian tells us that Joe can’t deal with the fact that Louie & Michael got rid of him because Joe thought he was better than everyone else.  Back in the room, Louie tells Joe he always loved him and his wife.  Everyone laughs at that but Joe makes a point to tell Louie he’s not laughing.  Louie & Michael promise big hugs for everyone at the finish line and hopes there are no hard feelings.

The call ends and Joe is still annoyed.  Now that he knows they went to a country where he spoke the language, he’s even more upset.  Jeff asks if he doesn’t think that would’ve been an unfair advantage and Joe tells him he came on the race because he wanted to have that advantage.  Joe and Jeff start arguing about whether it’s an unfair or fair advantage and finally Jeff has had it and tells Joe that he was voted out because he was being a jerk.  It wasn’t about Joe being a threat or Joe speaking Chinese, Joe is just a jerk.

The next morning, Joe promises us that he will have a word with Louie & Michael at the end.  Heidi smiles and nods smugly along. Finally, it’s over.

Hobie Barnes works in NYC at 30 Rock (the building, not the show). While not conquering Midtown, he might be found watching DVR’d reality TV, learning the guitar (I’m not afraid of you anymore, C chord!), or getting lost on the subway. He can be reached at hobiewan76@gmail.com.