The Amazing Race 13 Insider, Episode 8: “Who Was the Ass, By the Way?”

The final five teams are racing against elimination and one thing seems to be unanimous: all the teams want to race against Dan & Andrew in the final leg! What do Dan & Andrew think of that? Does Phil have a crush on Starr or does he just want to foster a budding romance between her & Dallas? Get the inside scoop and some Elimination Station updates in these recaps!

You’ve got plenty of video recaps to get through so I won’t hold you up here at the top too much. It is funny to note how all the teams want to race against Dan & Andrew, though. Dan & Andrew even have pseudo-support at Elimination Station! Enough about this, it’s time to start reading.

At The Pit Stop

Terence & Sarah’s Fond Farewell: Phil gets right to it and asks if Terence loves Sarah. Terence says he loves her immensely and is just honored to have raced with her. He thinks she has an incredible soul (which she doesn’t like hearing) and heaps praise upon Sarah all while she’s struggling to keep from bawling her eyes out. They’re good tears, though, and frankly, I’m impressed with Terence’s grace here. Maybe it’s just stress that makes him become the Terence we saw most of the race.

Phil wonders why Sarah doesn’t like the soul discussion, and it’s just too New Age-y for her. Phil points out that all that aside, Terence loves her and her soul and they’re together on this race. She admits that no one has ever loved her like he has. She realizes that it takes a special kind of person to be with either one of them.

Overall, the race was an incredible and humbling experience for Sarah. The race was not only hard, but also fun. Phil wonders if The Amazing Race was harder than running a marathon under three hours. According to Terence, The Amazing Race is definitely harder because with a marathon, there’s a fixed endpoint. Planning, traveling, and utter exhaustion on this race are unlike anything he’s ever done. Sarah thinks that while both she and Terence have made great personal accomplishments in regular life, they still couldn’t beat this.

Phil asks what their favorite moments were. Sarah remembers having a New York lunch moment before the flight to New Zealand where things almost seemed calm. Terence remembers seeing four Indian family members all riding on the same motorcycle. He also can’t forget how awesome the Mongol eagle was. It was pretty cool.

Ken & Tina’s Big Plans: The video starts in the middle of Phil asking, “Who was the ass, by the way?” Ha! He figures it out as he sees Ken is carrying the whole cow costume still. Ken tells him that Tina thought she would do a better job guiding them. Phil wants to know if Ken has enough energy left for the rest of the race. At the moment, Ken is exhausted especially from having Tina barking orders while in the cow costume. It also seems that when you were the business end of the cow, you were bent over the entire time just staring at the ground.

Phil notices Tina is full of energy still. He wonders if it’s feistiness, which she agrees with. She’s still tired from having to schlep around with the cow feet, and between the two of them, they’ve only had one bottle of water. She can’t wait to get some water. Besides water, can they visualize the end of the race? They fully agree and Ken still stands by his claim from last week that they’re bound to win this. Tina recognizes that they need to do things smarter (you and everyone else in this season!).

Considering what The Amazing Race would change in their lives, Tina brings up that she wants to provide help to the Children’s Cancer Center. They are all over the country and there’s a big need for them. Ken wants to open up an adventure sports center in Costa Rica that could help speed up their retirement. Ken also wants some payback by making it a kind of boot camp where the attendees have to wear a cow costume in 100-degree heat!

Andrew & Dan are Still Standing: Phil highlights that the Frat Boys are still in this race and have a great shot of being in the final three or even winning. Are they surprised? Dan thinks it’s unbelievable they’re still in it in spite of not having run a perfect leg yet. Andrew would be content if the final leg is when they achieve the perfect leg.

When asked by Phil why it’s unbelievable, Andrew thinks that not only is it unbelievable now but it will especially be unbelievable to viewers watching it on TV (I concur). Dan thinks viewers will be surprised that two “doofy” guys are making it so far. Andrew has exception with that adjective because he isn’t sure what it’s implying. He thinks a better adjective to describe them is “underestimated,” especially when compared to the “power” teams. Mark & Bill were the only other all-male team and Andrew knows that none of the other teams ever expected Andrew & Dan to outlast them (I concur).

Dan thinks the other teams have no choice but to recognize them as a threat (I disagree – other teams have just made stratospherically bad moves). Phil tells them that another team has said that they would love to see Dan & Andrew in the final three, not only because they love them but because they can beat them (I concur). Both are a little shocked by that but Dan thinks that that team will look really silly when Dan & Andrew win. Mmm hmmm…

Dallas’ Side of the Story: Phil points out how good life is for this team as they’re in second place and there’s even mischief in tents! Toni gives Phil a playful scowl and Dallas laughs that there was only cuddling going on (with Starr). Phil demands more info and if there was kissing. Dallas denies it and says after he wins the million dollars he’ll ask Starr for a kiss. Phil thinks Starr may want that kiss before then.

Concerning their performance this leg, Dallas gives Toni credit for racing through the golden egg Detour so quickly. They also take pride in having been a fun cow and getting in second place without using the Fast Forward. Phil asks them who they’d like to see leave and Toni diplomatically answers that everyone is great. Phil is nonplussed and they fess up that anyone remaining can leave… except for Dan & Andrew. Now we know who Phil quoted in “Andrew & Dan are Still Standing”!

Phil is impressed with Toni’s performance and she’s frankly surprised he is saying that to her. She was feeling exhausted during the cow costume leg, but she feels better after the compliment. Dallas is so proud of her, especially since she’s the oldest one out racing still. That quickly earns him a slap on the arm!

Another Spangler Sibling: Phil asks what their camouflage attire is about and they explain it’s because one of their siblings is currently serving in Iraq. Nick realizes that being in Kazakhstan is actually the closest they’ve been to him while he’s been out in Iraq. It feels good to be in first. Phil asks who they feel is their biggest competition left in the race. Starr answers that the team they’re glad is still in the race is Dan & Andrew. Okay, so TWO teams said what Phil reported to Dan & Andrew. That’s awesome! Both recognize that Ken & Tina are their main competition.

Phil wonders what Starr looks for in a man. Nick answers for her that it’s Dallas. He found them snuggling last night and she’s getting embarrassed. She responds that Nick is totally lying about the degree of cuddling and that it was just to keep each other warm. And she just happens to be looking for someone who’s ambitious, charming, has big arms (added by Nick), and looks like Dallas (added by Phil). She’ll admit that’s the truth.

Does Starr think that if she were to date Dallas, Toni would be an issue? Starr doesn’t think so as she loves Toni and sees that Toni & Dallas’ relationship is great. Is Nick okay with Starr’s fling with Dallas? He is, especially since he’s dating Starr’s best friend and plans to propose to her eventually. Phil asks if Nick would be okay if Dallas were his brother-in-law, which finally prompts Starr to cut them both off and say that the conversation is going way too far.

Phil continues and asks Nick what Starr sees in Dallas. It’s the big arms, the sense of humor, and the fearless, outgoing personality. Phil sneakily wonders if Dallas can kiss nice and Starr responds she wouldn’t know that. Nick thinks that all this attention is probably because Phil is jealous that Starr isn’t into him. Phil defers as he knows that Starr isn’t into some “old guy” and needs a “buffy, Stallone type.” Was that a slam? Ha!

After The Race:

Ken & Tina Size Up the Competition: Ken is surprised at how Toni & Dallas have evolved into real solid competitors. He believes it’s a combination of good luck and getting good breaks on their part. Well, duh. Concerning some other teams, Ken truly thought at the beginning that the final four would be Mark & Bill, Terence & Sarah, Nick & Starr, and, of course, Ken & Tina. But Nick & Starr’s continued success, despite earlier-in-the-race setbacks, has been able to fuel them to keep winning. Ken is confident they can still beat the other teams. All it will take is to remove their heads from their rear ends!

Nick & Starr All Grown Up: Starr acknowledges that while they’re both very young, they are quite mature and old for their age. So the race hasn’t made them grow up in that regard. Culturally the race has been instrumental in helping them be able to travel better in the future. Nick thinks they’ve matured within the scope of the race, though. After the win of the first leg, they were petrified to be the leaders and to have to make the first choices. Compare that to the last few legs where they love having that luxury.

Starr has learned that Nick is just goofy. He will just break out into dance in their hotel room. She didn’t know about that part of his personality previously. Nick has realized that Starr is very tenacious. He never knew she could get out there and fearlessly get things done. And she’s successful in doing it, which has impressed him a lot.

Tina Keeps Going and Going: Dallas states that when Tina is going to do something, there is no doubt about it. Tina likes to be in charge and Dallas is fine with that. He will gladly let her waste her energy on endeavors that don’t really call for overuse of energy. He knows that he’ll get the same benefit/information without the same energy drain.

Apparently the night before, Tina had managed to find 15 phone numbers for the chicken farm, most of which were disconnected. Toni thought it was pointless to do all that because none of the cab drivers really knew where to go anyway. Dallas has noticed that Tina will research random facts such as how long it takes to get from point A to point B. The problem is that the race isn’t taking them to point B! Tina just likes to know these things, apparently. Toni is now aware that it takes 82 hours by train from Kazakhstan to Moscow.

Dallas has seen that while Tina is on a research kick, Ken is looking for a place to crash and sleep. Dallas is amused at how different Ken & Tina’s personalities are and wonders how Ken can deal with Tina. Toni believes that if Ken & Tina have figured out a way to make it work, so be it.

The Non-Threatening Frat Boys: Andrew is certain that Nick & Starr don’t consider them a threat (he’d be right). He knows they’d be considered the underdogs in the final leg. Yet he reminds us that even Nick & Starr aren’t infallible as they once went from first place to sixth, so anything’s possible. Dan knows that a team can’t be on its game every single leg. Maybe most of the time, but most doesn’t cut it. Except in horseshoes. What about hand grenades?

Dan is aware that when Nick & Starr are telling them that they want Dan & Andrew in the final three, it’s because they aren’t perceived as a threat. Dan isn’t exactly thrilled to have that perception out there, but he’s fine with getting to the final three and surprising everyone.

Terence & Sarah’s Final Thoughts: Terence doesn’t know where life will take him, but he hopes that Sarah is with him. They’ve been together nearly a year and they’ve seen a lot before and during the race. What he hasn’t seen is someone with a girlfriend that has the quality of never quitting. Terence has that with Sarah, though. Sarah is listening to this and tearing up and wiping her eyes. Terence explains that Sarah never quits on him or on herself, which is essential in his eyes. As he says, “When you stop living, you start dying.” He’s very earnest about his praise and I think he just wants to see Sarah completely drenched in tears.

Sarah thinks that the race brought out a lot of things relevant to them as individuals and as a couple. Things were said and done that are regretted, but they were key to truly getting to know each other. They now know things that they have to work on but most importantly they know they’re compatible. I guess that shoots my theory down that I thought for sure they’d break up after this! Sarah is bummed that the game is over yet knows they have a lot to be proud of in terms of how they performed. Through it all, she recognizes that having found someone like Terence is very special.

Extra Footage During the Race:

Short-Term Agreement: It’s right after leaving the airport and Ken & Tina are in their cab. Tina explains that they are working with Nick & Starr and Toni & Dallas. While on the plane they ended up meeting a Kazakh native who graduated from Vanderbilt University. He made sure they got in a cab that knew where to go and wasn’t overcharging them. Ken tells that because those were the other teams on the plane at the time, they decided to have a controlled situation up till the chicken factory. They’re just not concerned with the other two teams being hours behind and there’s no reason to hustle.

Tina reveals that she had about ten phone numbers to call for the factory but none of them worked (info we learned from the video “Tina Keeps Going and Going”). She was trying to figure out operating hours but guesses it could be that it doesn’t open till the morning. Tina was relieved to have a stress-free exit from the airport and to have the game not be on. Ken disagrees with that sentiment and says the game is just on idle. He does think that this collaboration helps their position amongst the top three as they were the odd team out. Tina justifies their withdrawal earlier because assists she gave to Nick & Starr helped them win and the help was never reciprocated.

Nick & Starr Slip Up: In a cab, Nick & Starr are frantically asking the cab driver to turn around as they forgot something back there. As the cab driver turns around, Nick reveals he left his fanny pack at the restaurant where the Fast Forward competition was. Nick is glad he at least realized it before they were too far away. As they run towards the restaurant, Starr panics as she notices the cab leaving. She runs back but sees he’s just turning around and not leaving them. They enter the restaurant, passing a “Fast Forward taken” sign, and the owner has the fanny pack waiting for them. At least when they make a mistake, these two immediately realize it and correct it. If they don’t win this season (and Dan & Andrew do), I’ll be very surprised.

Nick & Starr Settle Down: Nick compliments Starr on polishing off their Fast Forward meal. Neither sounds or looks very good, though, as it’s clear they’re full from all that food. As they’re recalling what they saw being eaten elsewhere in the restaurant, Nick is burping up a lot. Nick recalls all the visual distractions, including the dancing girls, but he was determined to keep focused. He did notice they had nice abs. Both realize that the food is going to take a while to digest, but they’re still happy having won the Fast Forward. For Nick, it’ll be doubly worth it if Terence & Sarah get eliminated. They were certain that Terence & Sarah would U-Turn them if given the chance. Both just hope it’s not a non-elimination leg.

Caravan to Chickens: In Toni & Dallas’ cab from the airport, Dallas thinks they may need the multiple-hour head start over the other teams as they don’t know where they’re going for sure. Dallas talks about the Vanderbilt guy, too (like Tina in “Short-Term Agreement”), and is impressed that the Kazakhs drive within the lines on the road. It’s a good start.

Opposite Day for Dan & Andrew: Andrew & Dan are talking about their experiences with their previous cab driver who had to be guided everywhere. Frustratingly, they couldn’t even ask people to help give directions. Dan thinks it could have been worse as while it should have been a half-hour trip, it was instead an hour. Andrew finds the people in Almaty to be very bitter and not helpful. He hadn’t seen anything like that in any of the places they’ve traveled through so far. Even in India the people were glad to help. It’s the complete opposite of that right now.

Rise & Shine: Dan & Andrew apparently just arrived outside the chicken factory and are telling Nick about their 17-hour layover in Dubai. Andrew asks about the sleeping conditions here and Nick takes them over to the camp. Tent-like tepees have been erected, which is a lot better than I had imagined these teams were going to get. The boys catch up with Terence & Sarah and Ken & Tina, and Tina is jealous that they got to go to Dubai. Terence tries some lame plays on the word “frat” when asking what Dan & Andrew did while waiting in Dubai. Andrew comments that the tent floor looks pretty comfortable and Sarah is quick to disagree on that one.

The Biggest Challenge: On the taxi ride from the Fast Forward back to the chicken factory, Sarah talks about knowing that eating was going to be a potential problem. An obvious reason was Terence not having eaten meat for 15 years. Terence seems a little annoyed that he had to eat it but somewhat lets it go. Sarah asks him what the meat tasted like, and for him it tasted like the liver and onions his mom served him as a kid. He didn’t like it then and doesn’t like it now. Sarah comments she can’t talk about it without wanting to throw up but continues to do so anyways. Terence just looks miserable.

Lost In Kazakhstan: It’s the middle of the night and Sarah is super stressed. She’s standing in some deserted street telling us that the cab driver has no idea how to get to the chicken factory. And currently she’s beginning to freak out as they seemingly are in the middle of nowhere. Back in the cab, it seems that a guess has been made that the factory would be on the outskirts somewhere. Alas, that is not the case in Sarah’s mind and she wants to stop every car driving past them to ask where they are.

Elimination Station:

Terence & Sarah Eliminated: The residents of Elimination Station board their trusty van and head out to the big rocky cliffs of Acapulco. We can see men in Speedos climbing up the cliffs, and it becomes obvious this is where crazy folk go to do cliff diving. Bill notices that the height the cliff divers are jumping from is probably the same as their earlier bungee jump. Yowza! One of the divers proceeds to do a jaw-dropping swan dive into the ocean below and the group stares in shock at this act of craziness. A few more divers jump off and the video gets some great perspectives of their dives. Back at the villa, Tyrone (formerly Ty) admits he has a lot of respect for the divers.

At night, the gang is back at the speakerphone table and Bill asks everyone who they expect to receive a phone call from. Tyrone speculates Dan & Andrew. Mark agrees but says that he’s been saying that for a while and perhaps his saying that is good luck to them. So he’ll continue saying it. A lot of the teams hope that Ken & Tina win it all, although Tyrone would like to see Toni & Dallas win as they stopped to help Ty & Aja at one point. For that same reason, Mark is pulling for Terence & Sarah to win.

Prepare to be disappointed, Mark, as the phone rings and Terence & Sarah are on the line! The crowd is blown away and can’t believe it. This reaction brings a smile to Terence & Sarah. Mark tells them that they’ve all been pulling for them and they’re disappointed they’ve been eliminated. Stephanie asks where they’re at and Sarah tells them Kazakhstan. In the background, you can hear someone ask, “Where is that?” My money is on Marisa or Brooke for that comment. Terence & Sarah are glad that everyone gets to be in Acapulco and can’t wait to see everyone at the end. After the phone call, Mark smiles and says, “Dan & Andrew till the end!”